The Sickness and Peanut Butter Jelly Time

Friday, February 12, 2010

Thoughts on The Sickness

I'm still letting this last episode sink in, and as time goes on, I can't stop thinking about Claire, Sayid, and who knows who else (Rousseau, Christian Shephard, Aaron perhaps?), all of whom have been "claimed".  What does this all mean?  I'm baffled by the idea that the island sickness, first introduced to us by Rousseau in Season One, Episode Nine (Solitary) is connected to this idea of becoming "claimed" by something that gets into your heart. What exactly has "claimed" these people and how did they become "claimed"?

When did Claire become "claimed"? Was she traveling through time with the rest of us last season? Is she going to shoot Jin!? 

Any thoughts on this apparent Zombie-like illness?

In other news, Carlton Cuse tweeted late on Wednesday that they have officially begun writing the final episode of LOST....EVER. Damon Lindelof tweeted today that writing the last episode is like eating a bittersweet box of chocolates.  He also tweeted, and I quote, "Never put baby in a corner. And by "baby", I mean LOST. I'm not sure what that means, but it did make me giggle a bit. 

Anyhow, I received the following from an email from my friend and fellow Lostie Amber, and I just thought it was too good not to share. 

LOST Characters Explain How To Make a Sandwich on the Island:

1. Gather ingredients
2. Point gun at ingredients and shout “HOW DO I MAKE A SANDWICH OUT OF YOU?!?!?”
3. Breathe heavily through your nose as though you were about to hit ingredients
4. Give up and make the sandwich yourself, and eat it bitterly

1. Make separate sandwiches, one with peanut butter and one with jelly
2. Take a bite of the peanut butter sandwich, declaring it the best
3. Take a bite of the jelly sandwich, declaring it the best
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 ad infinitum
5. Follow peanut butter or jelly sandwich into grave danger

1. Throw the jar of jelly at wall, sneering “I don’t need no sandwich”
2. Call the mascot on the jar of peanut butter lots of clever nicknames
3. Huff and puff and stomp around and grumble a lot
4. When no one’s looking, make perfect, even, symmetrical peanut butter and jelly sandwich and sit in a corner, enjoying every bite

1. Sit idly by, believing that the ingredients will find a way to make a sandwich out of themselves
2. Lose faith and make the sandwich anyway
3. Realize that you were the instrument by which the ingredients chose to make a sandwich after all
4. Run around the room and grab everyone’s knives, insisting that their sandwiches will do the same in time

1. Make sandwich
2. Eat sandwich
3. Repeat steps 1 and 2 ad infinitum

1. Procure 23 milligrams of uranium-20
2. Set hadron supercollider to eight megajoules
3. Program a sandwich-making macro using Cobol or Visual Basic
4. Act all tough-like

1. Eat sandwich
2. Call the sandwich “brother”
3. Place peanut butter slice over jelly slice
4. Spread jelly on the other slice
5. Spread peanut butter on one slice
6. Take two slices of bread, a jar of peanut butter and a jar of jelly

1. Steal someone else’s sandwich
2. Claim you coerced them into making the sandwich for you all along
3. Say you’ll tell them everything if they make you another sandwich
4. Stare at them all creepy-like

1. Lay out plans for one of the most intricate, fascinating, and delicious sandwiches of all time
2. Just as you start making it, get shot

1. Apply peanut butter
2. Disappear for eight months
3. Apply jelly
4. Disappear for eight months
5. Eat sandwich

1. Mmmmmmm, peanut butter

Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse
1. Make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich
2. Have someone take a bite, then tell them it’s a baloney sandwich
3. Make up a whole bunch of other shit, then say you had planned it all along
4. Buy a few yachts

I hope you all laughed as hard as I did when I read this.  Can you think of any other characters that would make a PB and J on the island? Rose? Sun? Boone? Jacob? Smokey? Pop me a comment!

Have a great Friday and don't forget to vote in the poll!


Anonymous said...

How Arzt makes a PBJ:
1.) Ground some peanuts and pick some grapes
2.) Tell an enraptured audience how to combine the ingredients into a wonderful sandwich
3.) Do so suspensfully
4.) Get really annoying and explode your self and sandwich all over the audience
...Dude...Is that Arzt or Jelly...You gonna eat it??

kmlapham said...

Great work Dave! Love it.

Don't forget that he would probably also talk about how his three ex-wives never liked his PB and J.

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